We never do learn another thing about her, except that she vaguely likes handsome stupid emotionless lucky pirates, but is too shy to do much about it. She's upset about that, because now she can no longer wear the topless dresses currently fashionable at court. What's she like? Well, we're told she has dark hair, and that she considered her breasts her best feature until a Bad Man scarred them with a cigar. So did the author, for she makes her entrance on page 162. Wait now, there at least has to be a heroine, doesn't there? Beautiful Lady Something-or-Other, who starts out snooty but ends up a regular girl, right? Okay, you're right, I forgot her. What does the Caribbean look like? Well, you know, right? Like that. Presumably they have emotions and thoughts, but few are mentioned and only when it will move the story along.įorget scenic description, too. He bets every inside straight and always fills it.Īll the other 'characters' look exactly as you imagine they would, because they're all minimally described, and they behave exactly and only as the plot requires. His sole drive is to be the most successful pirate in the world, and it won't be a problem. Hunter is a 17th-century version of Richard Stark's famous 20th-century anti-character, Parker - only handsomer, and much stupider.

He has no emotions, no sex drive, no sense of humour, no sensual pleasures, no habits or hobbies or hopes or human flaws of any kind. However you imagine a handsome pirate looks, that's how he looks. Why did he become a pirate? Because Crichton required one. Every plan he makes is based on the assumption that he can't lose. The hero is a suicidally stupid but unbelievably lucky pirate, Captain Charles Hunter. And you'll need to relax your suspension of disbelief to the point where you should avoid accidental exposure to Glenn Beck while reading it. But you'll have to do nearly all the work yourself. It's certainly possible to imagine a novel or film while reading Yet it is selling like crazy, critics have anointed it, readers are unanimously raving about it on, and Stephen Spielberg has committed to film it.

Pirate Latitudes by Michael Crichton